


Before the Storm

by faerieboi



Category: The Mortal Instruments
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Fluff, M/M, MIGHT BE TRIGGERING, Open Ending, Sadness, Tear Jerker, feeling worthless, malec malec malec, pretty angsty, you interpret what happens next
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-24
Updated: 2016-03-24
Packaged: 2018-05-28 17:04:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6337693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faerieboi/pseuds/faerieboi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“It hurts,” Alec whispered, his eyes meeting Magnus's. “It hurts so much and an iratze won't help. It can't fix this, definitely not something—not something like this,” he said, his frustration and sadness loud and clear in his voice.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Before the Storm

**Author's Note:**

> i apologize in advance

Alec didn't know what to do with himself. He felt useless, sitting in his room in front of his bed with his hands in his hair. His eyes were rimmed red like someone who had been crying, which was the case.

His heart ached in his chest and he suddenly felt hot, his hands clutching at his shirt over his chest. He needed to get out of the institute now. All he could think about was him. His brother, Max.

Max. Max. Max.

Alec stormed out of his room, making his way down the stairs of the institute. He could hear his sister's sobbing coming from a room down the hall. When he needed to be at the institute the most, he couldn't bare it. The air in the room tasted stale, and he couldn't breathe.

He didn't really know where he was going as he wandered the streets of Brooklyn. His feet were carrying him somewhere his mind didn't know.

Hours later he found himself in front the door owned by the person he cared for the most, besides his family. Alec's entire body trembled, and he tried to keep the dam from breaking in his mind while he knocked on the door.

When Magnus appeared at the door, Alec felt the dam shatter like it was made of glass and everything was flooding. Alec choked out a sob and he quite literally fell into Magnus's arms, his knees buckling.

Magnus thought the worst almost immediately. He caught Alec in his arms, and slowly brought him to the ground. Magnus closed the door behind them both and leaned against the frame, holding Alec in his arms.

He didn't ask Alec what was wrong, but all he knew was that it was bad. Very bad. Alexander was the strongest person Magnus knew, and he had never seen him so sad and upset. It made Magnus's stomach churn at the thought of someone hurting his love.

Alec's sobbed tore through him, his face contorted in pain and his hands reaching at Magnus, even though he was right in front of Alec. He scratched at Magnus desperately, like Magnus was air and he couldn't breathe.

Magnus grabbed Alec's hands, intertwining their fingers together and squeezing their hands together tightly. For a moment, Magnus thought Alec's sobs had subsided, but another tsunami came crashing down on him.

Alec yanked his hands away from Magnus's and grabbed his own face. He scratched at the skin under his eyes, his breath ragged like he ran a marathon. “Why him? Why him?” He muttered, his voice rough.

Magnus pulled Alec's hands away from his face and held them tightly, making sure they wouldn't leave his grasp. “Alexander..” He said slowly, like Alec was an animal and Magnus was trying not to scare him away.

“He was so young. He was 8 years old and he didn't get live, and there was nothing I could do, nothing—” Alec gasped, trying to take in more air. He felt the weight on his chest grow heavier, and more tears ran down his cheeks. He kept saying all of these things and Magnus finally got it.

The little Lightwood.

“Oh, Alexander,” Magnus whispered. He pulled the broken shadowhunter into his grasp and wound his arms around his waist. Magnus could feel Alec's back jerk as he cried, and the tears soak through his shirt and onto his shoulders.

“Let's get you to bed,” Magnus said, rubbing his hands up and down Alec's back. He never let go of Alec as they both got up. Alec was quiet now, his face wiped of all happiness and left in its place was sorrow. Magnus pulled him into his bedroom, basically their bedroom. He sat Alec down on the mattress and grabbed the hem of his black long-sleeve. Alec raised his arms as Magnus pulled his shirt and the rest of his clothing off of Alec, leaving the boy in his boxers.

Magnus rested a hand on Alec's shoulder, and his other hand in Alec's soft black hair. Magnus pushed the hair away from his forehead, his head tipping back slightly, exposing his neck. Alec looked at him through droopy eyes, tears making the blue in his eyes look like waves during a storm. His cheeks and nose were red from the crying, and Magnus felt helpless. He was going to do all that he could do to comfort Alexander in his time of need.

Magnus pressed his lips to Alec's forehead, leaving his mouth there for a few seconds before kissing both of Alec's eyelids, and then lips. Magnus barely pressed his lips to Alec's, but he got his point across.

He pulled away from Alec's mouth, and guided Alec under the covers. Alec moved robotically, like his brain had shut down and he was on autopilot.

“It hurts,” Alec whispered, his eyes meeting Magnus's. “It hurts so much and an iratze won't help. It can't fix this, definitely not something—not something like this,” he said, his frustration and sadness loud and clear in his voice.

Magnus's eyes softened and he climbed into bed beside Alec, moving close to his shadowhunter and gathering the boy into his arms. Alec had shattered, and Magnus was going to be there to pick up the pieces and put him back together.

Magnus ran his fingers through Alec's hair, over and over again. Alec had curled up against Magnus's chest, his face buried in the crook of the warlock's neck. Tears streamed down his cheeks, but no sound left him. His body trembled and jerked, breaths coming out in puffs, and occasional breaths where it sounded like he was choking, but no screaming or whimpering. He didn't have that left in it him. He felt like someone had taken a shovel and digged their way through his body, taking everything out and leaving a gaping abyss behind.

After a while, sleep had taken Alec, and his body had relaxed. His breathing was back to normal, and his face was calm. His skin wasn't flushed anymore, but his cheeks were sticky with dry tears. Magnus kissed under Alec's eyes, and finally relaxed when he knew Alec would be okay for the time being.


End file.
